This is my door.
This is the poop that the bird leaves on my door everyday as it graciously awakens me at 4am peck peck peck peck peck peck pecking at the glass on my door.
These are the bags under my eyes that have formed after many sleepless mornings of this bird attacking my house.
This is now my brain, on birds.
This is me amidst the piles of work that are not getting done because of the bird.
This is my plan.
I googled “scare bird” and came up with that image of an “owl.” It’s a balloon you can buy, but since my only problem is the damn bird pecking on the glass on my door, I figured I could probably print that sucker out and tape it to the glass. I’m hoping it scares the bird away, but I will accept it literally scaring the shit out of the bird as long as it stops pecking on the glass.
Tomorrow morning will be day #1 of my attempts to fight back against the bird…
Update: Jan 15
I was so sleep deprived last night, I applied for a job at the CAJA when I meant to only sign up for an online account. I don’t even know how that happened and didn’t even realize it until I got an email from them thanking me for my application. :/
Progress: The bird did not peck at 4am.
Setbacks: He did show up at 6am. He did not peck the door very much, but he did move over to the gigantic window.
Plan: I am going to print more pictures of owls, cats, and maybe even some dogs (I really don’t like cats), and spray gold spray paint on something and hang that up. I’m also going to talk to my neighbor about setting up a pedestal in the yard for our fruit trash. Maybe he will go peck at that…
Update: Jan 24
I got lazy, maybe from sleep deprivation, and did not do jack until the other day. …to my credit, I have also been at the beach for the majority of last week. I hung up a gold chain and set some CDs on the door and that worked for a few days until this morning when the bird figured out he could throw the CDs to the ground. He is more intelligent than I thought.
My next move will be to get some fishing line and hang the CDs up around my porch so they move and twirl with the wind. I might tape those suckers there on the door, too. Never mind the fact that I am going to look like one of those crazy people that collects shiny things to hang all over the house and yard.