I’m always going on and on about my amazing perfect little mountain town in the rainforest, but it’s not all daily rainbows and tropical bliss. Real talk – there are some disadvantages to living in a tree house in the jungle.
The *#)@(*% birds wake up before the sun at 4am. If the chirping doesn’t wake you up, the repetitive full-speed body slams into the windows will. If you somehow manage to sleep through that (alcohol), then the incessant pecking at the glass will most definitely arouse you from your slumber and rocket you in to a hate-filled rage that results in the purchase of a pellet gun on Earth Day.
2. Water from above.
Jungle tree houses spring leaks. It happens. Murphy’s Jungle Tree House Law: Water will only leak over your bed or electronics, and only when you are not at home to stop it.
If there is no rain, and no water to leak in to your house, then you are having a drought, which means you have another problem on your hands – a water shortage, aka water from below.
3. Water from below.
The municipality might decide to shut the water off at any time without warning for an unspecified length of time. Awesooooome. Filling a bucket of water becomes as much of a habit as brushing your teeth. Furthermore, when the water is on, it may or may not make its way up the pipe to the faucet, depending on how many people downstairs are using it. Imagine the water is off all day, then it is on again in the evening and everyone below you is doing dishes, taking showers, washing children, frolicking in geyser-like water spouts – you aren’t getting any water in your tree house. (Experienced jungle plumbers needed, apply using the contact form!)
4. Spiders or Bugs.
You have to choose one. I highly recommend spiders because they eat almost all the bugs. My housekeeper cleaned all the spider webs in my house one time and the following two weeks were Bugdemic: Shock and Terror. It was a bug invasion of massive proportions. I felt like I was camping in the Florida Everglades without a tent. Ugh. The only negative to chilling with spiders is that they leave dead bug carcasses all over the place. Not ideal, but soooooo much better than bug invasion.
So who wants to visit me and the spiders? No one, which brings me to the final disadvantage of living in a tree house in the jungle:
How many people want to go on vacation to a beautiful jungle mountain paradise? 3,256,977.
How many people want to live in a beautiful jungle mountain paradise? 3.
Unless I include people under 18 or over 65, there are only 3 of us. You need to own your own business and/or work wirelessly if you want to live in a jungle paradise. You also need a car so you can come down from the mountain and mingle with city folk… unless you are cool with the bus, which you can’t be because you won’t have time for your business if you are waiting on the bus all day.
This works in reverse, too. You have to have a car or a lot of time to come visit me in my perfect little mountain town.
Despite those five disadvantages, living in a tree house in the jungle is still pretty freaking awesome. I want to hear from you guys – what kinds of issues have you dealt with in order to live in a gorgeous place? Would you live with spiders and without water?